Chadzilla ROARS!!!

Hack/Slash #15 - 17, featuring Herbert West, Re-Animator

"If you truly want to live again...you'll have to take your medicine."

Going down the list of potential parental suspects, Cassie finally finds her father, Dr. Jack Hack.  The reunion is a troublesome one, though.  For Hack is assisting Dr. Herbert West with the Re-Animator's "Re-Agent" experiments and the duo have one very special test subject to work with.  The notorious "Lunch Lady," Delilah Hack.

First the bad.  Cassie's reunion with her father is rushed to the point of its becoming a blurred mess.  While the reunion does answer some questions, albeit in a most unsatisfactory and unrewarding way, it raises a great many more that will no doubt lead to further gruesome run-ins with revenant slashers.  No complaints on the latter point, but the former left me cold and every bit as confused about Jack Hack and his self-destructive motivations as Cassie seemed to be.

Then again, this is a serial where real world rules do not apply and writer Tim Seeley (with story creating assist from Barry Keating) might have been muddying the waters for future clearing.

I hope that statement makes sense.

Now for the good.  The story kicks ass in all other departments.  Herbert West is still the insanely driven Herbert West.  The reunion of Jack and Delilah is a rocking rollercoaster ride of horror, humor and pathos laced with generous and very much appreciated amounts of sex and violence.  Then there are the nudges, nods and winks to various classic slashers in the arc's middle chapter, issue #16.  It's nice to see Michele Soavi's Stage Fright getting some love, along with the usual suspect(s).  That's the kind of stuff that makes Hack/Slash so special.

David Arquette's The Tripper (One Shot)

"Ronnie Reagan?"

The Annual Free Love Festival has come to lovely Carlyle, California.  But the festivities are spoiled when an axe wielding lunatic dressed up like Ronald Reagan crashes the party.

I thought David Arquette's retro-slasher horror/comedy The Tripper was okay.  It had some good moments and kills, but it also over stayed its welcome by a considerable margin.  About ten or fifteen minutes, say.

This comic book adaptation trims a considerable amount of that narrative fat off of the story, but it also loses some of the film's funnier - and funniest - jokes because of it.  Like the bit with the dogs.  If you have seen the film, then you know it.  Hell, if you've seen the film's trailer, then you'll know it.  Also lost is the depth of character development, with Samantha's spoiled rich kid ex-boyfriend suffering the most.  He's whittled down to a brief, four panel punchline.

What the story doesn't lose in the translation is the gore.  There's plenty of the red stuff splashing around the, uh, splash pages.

But, having actually seen the film, I can only say that the ample amount of red stuff splashed across the pages cannot hide the fact that this adaptation is pretty bare bones stuff.  If you want the meat of the story, I recommend you skip reading this and just watch The Tripper instead.

Army of Darkness: Ash's Christmas Horror

"Hero time..."

T'was the night before Christmas and all through the S-Mart the last minute shoppers did dart.  Then from Santa's Workshop there arose a nightmarish clatter and Ash came running, to see what was the matter.  Santa and his elves had become Deadites!  Ash sent them back to hell before they could wish all a not-so-good night, permanently.

But no good deed can go unpunished...

The first two pages of this Christmas holiday themed one shot should bring back plenty of unpleasant memories for any or all that have ever had to work retail during the Christmas season.  Peace on Earth and Goodwill to All, my ass.  There is a very good reason why I DO NOT go near a retail establishment during the last week of November and the entire month of December, and how nice to was to have writer James Kuhoric and artist Dave Simons remind me of it.  The demoniacally grinning kids stampeding to "see Santa" were more horrific than the Deadites Ash had to do battle with a few pages later.

But the utterly gratuitous, albeit greatly appreciated, up-skirt shots on "Mary Christmas" made it all worth it.  Almost.

While Ash's Christmas Horror had its cute moments, it was also a disappointing reminder of why I stopped reading Army of Darkness.  Ash isn't a particularly likable, or even dramatically interesting, hero and the action in this one shot is one note, at best.  For those that can't get enough of the same old same, then there just might be something to enjoy in this two-act story.

Act One is Ash battling the Deadite Santa on Christmas Eve.  Act Two jumps ahead to the next Christmas and has Ash doing the whole Christmas Carol lesson learning thing, via all those Christmas television specials that everyone over the age of 40 has seen well over 40 times.  The gag is cute, at first, and Dave Simons wrings as much visual mirth from it that is possible, but the ultimate message/meaning behind the journey has zero to do with Christmas (for that you'd be better off just going to the parody source material) and the closing joke has too much of the unreformed Scrooge in it for it to be funny or for the wish to have a Merry (and Deadite free) Christmas to have any sincerity to it.  Nonetheless, Ash's Christmas Horror should be a suitable stocking stuffer for the Army of Darkness loving fan boy (or girl) lounging under (or around) this (or next) year's Christmas tree.  It just wasn't for me.

The Witching Hour #70 (Vol. 9, April 1977)

Three shocker stories of surprise and suspense.

The cover wouldn't lie to you, would it?

Drone of the Dying: After he is attacked by a swarm of bees, a hiker awakens in a strange hospital.

The Humpty-Dumpty Hobo: Old Joe the Hobo is struck by a car and carted off to the hospital.  Being a poor man, he cannot afford the kind of top notch plastic surgery needed to treat his wounds.  But his doctor assures him that there is a way around Old Joe's financial problem.

The Eerie Secret of File #113:  Leo Larsen hires a pair of industrial spies to steal a scientist's greatest invention.  The secret to which is hidden inside file #113.

Of the strolls down memory lane that I have taken, I think The Witching Hour #70 qualifies as one of the larger disappointments, if not the largest.  I cannot say that I truly enjoyed any of the stories.

Drone gets off to a promising start, but then it trips over its own "twist" (just look at the cover, okay) and falls flat on its face.  The rest of the story was the reading equivalent of watching a fallen someone wobble to their hands and knees and reach out for something while desperately trying to maintain balance...and failing.  Hobo is just a two-page joke, with the punchline smacking poor old Joe right in what is left of his face.  Cute, but nothing special.  There was a far better plastic surgery gag story in issue #71.

Also nothing special is that Eerie Secret buried in the mysterious file #113.  It's just another robot story.  Interesting to note that this robot story is narrated by Cynthia, who told yet another robot story way back in issue #56.  Chick really needs to work on her material.

Then again, I'm not the age group that this book was marketed towards and, to be fair, the odds are against me enjoying every stroll down memory lane.  There will be times like this one, when I get a clear reminder that the "Good Old Days" weren't always so good.

Kolchak Tales: Night Stalker of the Living Dead

"I think something's wrong here."

Kolchak is sent off to Georges Corner, Nebraska to interview the newest hot young face in Show Business, Wendi Fairchild.  Ms. Fairchild is supposed to be performing at her home town's Corn Festival, but the assorted festivities are interrupted by an outbreak of what appear to be flesh-eating "zombies."

The only genuinely surprising thing about Night Stalker of the Living Dead is that it has taken this long for Carl to have a run-in with George A. Romero style zombies.

Well, maybe not the only thing.  The appearance of some giant mutated man-eating pigs keeps issues two and three interesting, at least.

The fact that it has taken so long for Carl to venture into George's Corner of the genre (Get the ham fisted "irony" of the town's name now?) that the time lag works against it.  Flesh-eating zombies have so saturated the horror comic that there is next to no novelty to the encounter.  (Other than the pigs, that is.)  Carl is far too late in joining the party to really enjoy it.

Not that the story arc is a complete and utter washout.  The framing device is cute and Carl gets some romantic gravitas going with the local Sheriff, a smart and sexy glass of water named Kristin Collins.  Both play out as one would expect such sub-plots to in a Night Stalker story, but the humor in the former and the character interaction in the latter are solid.  The only other decoration hanging on the story's tree is an underdeveloped, albeit lively, appearance by Wendi Fairchild, the Hometown Girl made good n' famous.  Her participation, and I use that term very loosely, in the third act allows author Christopher Mills to tie all of his assorted story threads together into a nice and neat little self-contained decorative bow.  Perhaps a bit too neat.  But, as was the case with the framing device and the love interest, there is something to enjoy/appreciate in the story's conclusion.  That would be the conversation between Carl and an anonymous official "handling" the "situation."  Again, it's nothing new, but it manages to hit the proper story beats in just the right way.  At least I thought so.

A Nightmare on Elm Street #4

"I'd dream about her...if I ever slept."

Little Lacey Powell, a third grader at Springwood Elementary, has mastered the dream world and begun tormenting Freddy Krueger.  The bastard son of a thousand maniacs is forced to enlist the aid of one of his potential victims to go out and "get" little Lacey Powell.

This one-shot epilogue to the Freddy's War storyline is...cute...and funny, but in a good kind of way.  There was just a certain kind of something about seeing Freddy driven to so much distraction by little Lacey Powell that he couldn't even find the interest/energy to dispatch of the random victims that have dreamed their way into his boiler room of torture and death.  "I don't have time for this."  Heh.

But when he finally does, little Lacey Powell shows up and gives him a cartoonish what for about it.  The artwork used to illustrate little Lacey Powell's unique weaponry during that battle has a playful childlike quality to it.  It acts as a nice counterbalance to the darker, nastier tone of Krueger and his world.

Once again writer Chuck Dixon has managed to craft a solid, and even happy, ending to his story; albeit one with an open door in it for other creative teams to enter through, should they choose to do so.  I even appreciated the somewhat illogical irony of the last line of dialog.  Then again, us parents have always been a tad clueless when it comes to our kids.

Welcome to Hoxford #1 - 4 (of 4)

"You're all being transferred to a new facility.  Government is trying something new with your sorry asses.  'Specially set up to deal with you mental nutjubs, apparently.  Called Hoxton or Hoxford or something."

A group of violent criminal offenders, a collection of murderers, pedophiles, rapists, necrophiliacs, and cannibals, are transfered to Hoxford, a privately run penitentiary built to house the worst of the worst.  In this group is Raymond Delgado, a delusional psychotic that is more than a bit different from his fellow inmates.  As the monstrous secret of who and what actually runs Hoxford is revealed, Delgado seems rather well prepared, and very eager, to do what has to be done.  It is as if he were meant to be there...

Author - illustrator - creator Ben Templesmith (author - illustrator - creator of the wonderful Wormwood: Gentleman Corpse) crafts an energetic, if somewhat slight, monster story that maintains a straight, blood streaked face until its bitter and brutal end.  No mordant or playful humor to be found here, or at least none that I could see.  It was just a lot of human and non-human monsters ripping each others throats out.  Not that there is anything wrong with that.  I actually enjoyed it on a strictly visceral level.  Which is a good thing, because, as I hinted at a few sentences before this one, that is pretty much the only level on which one can enjoy Welcome to Hoxford.

Templesmith keeps things simple, so he doesn't have a whole lot unnecessary distractions to keep him from unleashing the monsters and letting the blood flow.  But considering the amount of backstory and exposition needed for what is there, the who, what, and why of it all, Templesmith does a wonderful and economic job of rolling out the reveals and explanations.  Welcome to Hoxford is just a simple, well constructed and straight forward horror story.  I highly recommend it and would gladly go back for seconds, should any ever be offered.

Gravel #6: An English Country Garden

"What the fuck is this?"

Gravel has collected five of the six sections of the Sigsand manuscript, killing each of the five section holders while doing so.  Now, due to his inheriting Shockham Hall, Gravel could almost be considered a member of the Gentry.  But that doesn't matter to him, all he wants is the sixth and final section of the Sigsand.  Then he'll worry about all the other stuff, and there is starting to be a lot of stuff.

I was starting to get a tad worried, myself.  As much as I was enjoying the Gravel series, I was also beginning to notice just how repetitive it was.  Gravel would arrive at a location, meet the now corrupted to the Dark Side section holder, get insulted, and they would fight to the death, with Gravel being the ultimate victor.  (Well, it is his series, after all.)  He would then collect the needed Sigsand section and venture off to meet up with the next Sigsand section holder.

Wash, rinse and repeat.  And repeat.  And repeat.

Well, there was the lone exception of issue three's story, On Ilkley Moor Baht' At.  But that was only a minor variation on what was becoming a very familiar theme.  Sure I was enjoying it, but I was also starting to wonder if Warren Ellis and Mike Wolfer were going to do something with it.  Toy with it a bit, check out what might happen if they bent it this way, or twisted it that way.  How would it all flow then?

Well, it took them six issues to finally get there, but An English Country Garden breaks with the format and allows the human side of William Gravel to shine through as he rests up at Shockham Hall, meets and gets to know the acolytes he has inherited along with the Hall (How much do you want to bet that most of them won't survive to see the end of issue seven?) and basically prepare himself for the battle royal with Jacobus Hook, the holder of the final section of the Sigsand.

I don't know if it's me or not, but I found this outing to be a tad gentle.  Sure Gravel repeatedly mouths off to his inherited acolytes in his gruff, "I'm a bloke from the rough side of town that walks alone" shtick, but his reaction to a female acolytes request to prepare them for confrontation with Hook, and I could just be misreading his expression here, makes it look like he doesn't want what would happen to them to happen.  Then there is his confrontation with the spirit of Joanna, who was dispatched in issue two's story, The Stables of the Dead.  That doesn't go quite the way one would have come to expect, based on how every social situation Gravel has been in since issue one has turned into an action packed duel to the death.  No, here we see that there is much more to William Gravel than we have come to believe, and it is that very thing that makes him the excellent Combat Magician that he is.

The battle to come, be it of intellectual wits or of supernatural brawn, should be quite entertaining to see.

Crossed #0 & #1

"What you have to understand is that no one ever found out how it started."

But everyone sure as shit knew how it ended, with a loud and clear atomic bang that was far from the worst of it.  Because shortly before that first bomb went off, a random assortment of people across the globe suddenly turned gleefully, sadistically and murderously insane.  It's easy to tell who all the crazy people are, because they all bear a distinctive mark...

If complete and utter blood spattered carnage is your kind of thing, then Crossed should be your kind of horror comic.  This book has slopped the red stuff around from panel one and has only taken a handful of panels for a breath since the world went splat in the prologue vignette that was issue zero.  But this time around there is a very good reason for the madcap race to survive the Apocalypse of the Crossed.

You see, the Crossed are every bit as intelligent and communicative as they are sadistic and insane.  Imagine the terrors that could have been unleashed in 28 Days Later if the Infected of that film retained their intelligence and worked together to achieve their murderous ends.  That should give you some idea of the kind of threat that the ragtag group of survivors in Crossed have to face.  There are no safe havens in which to hide and try to "wait things out" while trying not to go stir crazy.  At this moment in time, it's a breathless race to stay at least one step ahead of the Crossed.  When the survivors do have a moment to rest, they dare not approach a populated area or even start a campfire to warm themselves, cook whatever food they have managed to grab and carry with them, or to purify the local ground water for drinking.  The outlook is certainly bleak.

While the current emphasis is clearly on graphic violence and twisted sexuality, writer Garth Ennis does not neglect his, at the moment, largish cast of characters too much.  While some, if not most, of them are obviously meant to be fodder for the Crossed, there a few that stand out from the pack and are clearly going to be the focus of the developing story.  At the moment the leader of the group is Cindy, a single mom that is fiercely protective of her son, Patrick.  Narrating these End Times style events is Stan, a young drifter that loves to tell the reader just how ill prepared everyone is/was for what one ill-fated survivor termed "a global clusterfuck."  Thomas, don't call him Tom, and Kelly, a young woman blinded by the atomic blast, appear to have been friends of Stan's from Before; for all three are rescued by Cindy during the chaotic beginnings of whatever it is that is happening.  (And I seriously doubt that the trees have anything to do with it.  Well, at least I hope they don't.)  What is in store for them doesn't look to be pleasant, but it sure as hell isn't going to be boring.

Zombie Tales The Series #1

Three tales of zombie mayhem by three master storytellers.

The War at Home Part 1: The Dead Get Busy: Story by Joe R. Lansdale, art by Eduardo Barreto.  A legless veteran and a buxom nurse find themselves in a nightmarish battle against the walking dead.

People Person: Story by Steve Niles, art by Daniel Lafrance.  Zombie plague survivor Scott Ball finally takes on the unpleasant task of dealing with his zombie wife, who refuses to leave him alone.

Spring 2061: Story by Kim Krizan, art by Jon Reed.  It's the 25th anniversary of the rise of the Zombie Class and Zombie Dominance Day celebrations are being held across the globe.

It's nice that whenever I start to grow tired of the glut of zombie stories out there, along comes a book that offers up something that convinces me that there might still be some creative life left in them rotten bones.  Zombie Tales The Series doesn't waste too much time creating some epic story line filled with dozens of characters trying to not only survive a zombie plague, but each other as well.  Of the three stories contained in this premiere issue, only The War at Home will continue on in future issues.  I don't know if that is a good or bad thing.  Lansdale's opening is filled with his distinctive energy and humor, but the action looks to have less narrative legs than his limbless central character.  But I have been a Lansdale fan since 1983 and know that he is utterly fearless of going way over the top, so I am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

The other two Zombie Tales are one shots that are far darker than Lansdale's slaptstick laden opener.  While I loved both, and the solid one/two punch they deliver is worth the cover price, Steve Niles' People Person edged out Spring 2061 for my Best of Issue vote by virtue of its potent final curtain call.  At least I am assuming that the words The End that appear on the final panel of the two yarns mean what they say.  (Lansdale's ends with a To Be Continued tag.)  But writers have been known to change their mind, either from seemingly idle "What if?" flights of fancy that insist they explore what happens next, or simple fan demand for "More!"  Must every fan channel Charles Dickens Oliver Twist and repeatedly ask for more?  Isn't enough ever enough?

Nah, give me more!

Spooks

"Ladies and gentlemen...we have a situation."

SPOOKS are what the warriors recruited, trained, armed and deployed by the United States Department of Supernatural Defense call themselves.  Their job is simple: defend the USA from its supernatural enemies, be they foreign, domestic, or otherworldly.

The most recent threat to the USA comes in the lovely form of Patience Van Anders, a powerful witch.  She has united the vampires and werewolves of the world to help in her plan to raise the dead to attack and subjugate the living.

Wait a minute, didn't invading aliens already try the whole raising the dead to overthrow the living gambit in Plan 9 from Outer Space?  Maybe they did, but they didn't have a creative team consisting of Larry (G.I. Joe) Hama, R.A. Salvatore, and Ryan (Abominable) Schifrin telling their story.  No, they had Edward D. Wood Jr. and we all know just how well that turned out, don't we?

But when a comic book story line has me comparing it to what has been described by many as the Worst Movie Ever Made (it really isn't, it's far too entertaining of a viewing experience to be) then that should be a clear signal the book is in danger.  Right?  Well, almost...because I was thinking Hellboy, Men in Black and the Masters of Horror episode Homecoming long before the Wood comparison came to mind.  Come to think of it, there was not a single moment in any of the four issue story arc that I was not thinking of something else.

Again, that could have been a bad thing.  A very bad thing.  But, for some odd reason, it wasn't.  Because SPOOKS was just so much damn fun to read.  Cracking open issue after issue and letting my eyes glide over panel after panel was an experience akin to slipping into my most comfortable pair of pajamas and slippers.  It was horror-action comfort food that more than made up for what it lacked in imagination with plenty of slam-bang action and a cast of likable and modestly colorful characters.  It scratched my horror geek itch and when Spooks Omega Team hits shelves this July, I'll be more than happy to snatch it up to find out what happens next.

Wormwood Gentleman Corpse #8: Segue to Destruction

"And the horsemen did look upon the Earth, and see much in the way of entertainment, hookers, and blow.  And it was good."

It's just another pleasant evening at The Dark Alley for Wormwood and the gang.  Pleasant, that is, until the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse's line of credit runs out at the Revelation Towers...

I've become so used to multiple issue story arcs that reading this one shot over my breakfast this morning was a bit of an unpleasant jolt.  It is not that the story is bad, far from it.  It's nasty, witty fun.  My problem was that I did not want it to end as quickly as it did!  I wanted more dirty, nasty snarkiness than I got.  I have become addicted to this book and its colorful cast of characters.  Creator/writer/artist Ben Templesmith has done a wonderful job of not only creating that colorful cast of characters, both hero and villain alike, he has also made learning about them just as much fun as watching them in action.  It takes a lot of hard work and talent to make exposition not only interesting, but fun to read and Templesmith - with the assist of Lorelei Bunjes - not only has that talent, but he lets the reader know  just how much he suffers for his art.  Your suffering is greatly appreciated by me, Mr. Templesmith.  Keep up the great work.

Freddy vs Jason vs Ash #1-6 (of 6)

Five years after the events of Freddy vs. Jason.

Christmastime is here and the town of Crystal Lake is not only preparing for the holiday, but for the ceremony that will officially change the name of their community to Forest Green.  (But haven't they already done that?)  Will and Laurie, survivors of the bloody brawl between Jason Voorhees and Freddy Krueger, return to the battleground - now dubbed Crystal Cottages at Forest Green - to double-triple-quadruple-check that the two titans of terror are if fact truly dead.

They aren't, but - in true slasher sequel fashion - both Will and Laurie soon are...

It's a good thing that the customer service in the Housewares department at the brand new warehouse sized Super Mega Ultra-S-Mart in Crystal Lake is terrible.  This means that S-Mart's top rated Senior Housewares Domestic Engineer is coming all the way from Detroit to set things right.  His name is Ashley J. Williams and he is the Chosen One...

Ah, the Freddy vs. Jason sequel that never was.  Damn you, Sam Raimi!  (Of course, some of you out there just might be thanking him for pulling the plug on the project...hope y'all enjoy that bad ass Evil Dead 4 he's always talking about but never, ever seems to get around to actually making.)  At least we have this goofy, bloody and oh-so-awesome comic book adapted from that shelved project.  Judging by what I read, I have to risk a guess that Freddy and Jason's round two would have been a bigger, better and, depending on who was behind the camera, bloodier smackdown than their first.

It would also be funnier...because this is a story that knows better than to take itself too seriously, if at all.  Neither Freddy or Jason have been all that frightening for the last 25 or so years (Jesus H. Christ, have they been around for that long?  I am getting old!) and The Evil Dead series (what with its barrage of Three Stooges homages) was never all that frightening to begin with.  But I was having too much fun reading the book to waste time whining about how not serious it was.  We're pretty deep into King Kong Vs Godzilla territory by this time, folks.  As long as you are okay with that kind of thing, then I think that you should be okay with this book.

One thing in particular that I was very okay with was just how deeply rooted the story is in the various mythos of each of the series.  Best of all was the call backs to each of the series films that came before this particular outing.  Remember how the Book of the Dead and various props from the Evil Dead movies were scattered around the old Voorhees place in Jason Goes to Hell?  So did the team of writers for Freddy vs Jason vs Ash and that is the thread they use to weave together the different storylines.  The Necromonicon Ex Mortis is still buried in the basement of the old Voorhees place (The team of artists did some decent research, because when I saw the first drawing of the old Voorhees place, my first thought was, "Hey that's the old Voorhees house from Jason Goes to Hell!") and Freddy wants it so he can harness its power and bust out of his dream world prison and warp reality to suit his insatiably evil desires.  Who better to trick into getting the old tome than Mrs. Voorhees favorite son, Jason?  That is where Ash comes into the battle, for wherever the Necromonicon Ex Mortis is, Ashley J. Williams, Chosen One, is sure to follow.

The addition of the character of Ash is where the most of the humor comes from, because the Chosen One sure does love to shoot off his mouth.  His presence also keeps the story from padding itself with unnecessary running in circles (a narrative trap that Freddy vs. Jason fell into) because it allows for more varied showdown carnage.  Jason fights Ash, then Freddy fights Jason, then Ash fights Freddy, then Jason fights Freddy, and then Ash fights Freddy and Jason, then Freddy and Jason go at it again, then Ash joins to make sure both stay down for the count...until the number of tickets sold (or books, in this particular instance) create a demand for yet another rematch.

But there were one or two things I was not okay with.  First was a glaring continuity error in issue four, wherein a Necromonicon possessing Freddy Krueger demands that Ash fetch the Necromonicon for him.  Uh, you already have it, Freddy.  So why are you demanding it?  If anything, Ash should be demanding that you turn it over to him.  Then there was the all new, all powerful Freddy whining on at less two separate occasions about how he would rather be someplace else instead of fighting with Jason and Ash.  If he can now move freely from dimension to dimension, why bother hanging around?  Just leave and return at a later date to dispatch with whoever has managed to survive the battle.

But these kinds of entertainments were never known for their strict adherence to the rules of logic.  In fact, my definition of horror has been boiled down to a very simple and to the point description:  The intrusion of the irrational into the rational.  The nature of the irrational, be it rooted in the supernatural or the simply natural, is irrelevant.  All that matters is how the characters in the story react and interact with the intrusion, that is where the drama, or some plain old fashioned fun, is found.  While there is certainly a lot of fun to be found in Ash's reaction to and interaction with Jason and Freddy, the cast of supporting characters that Ash interacts in between those, uh, interactions are a rather bland and one dimensional lot.  With the exception of a clipboard wielding S-Mart Night Manager that takes his job way too seriously and the requisite love interest for Ash, it was impossible for me to figure out who was who.  Their sole reason for existing seemed to be as grist for the slasher mill.  Then again, that same criticism could be leveled at just about any film in the Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, or Evil Dead series.  So one could very well ask what the hell was I expecting when I cracked this book open?  Something akin to Shakespeare?  Mamet?  Albee?

No, all I was expecting (and hoping for) was a "fun read" and that is exactly what I got.  I had so much fun reading it that my inner child almost threw a temper tantrum over the fact that would never, ever be a Freddy Vs. Jason Vs. Ash movie to watch on any given evening.

At least there's this book and for that I am truly grateful.

House of Mystery #1

In a quiet, small corner of the dreaming...

A group of strange, mysterious individuals trapped inside a House of Mystery pass the time and pay for their room and board by telling tales of the strange and mysterious...

It's back and...well, I think it's far too early to proclaim that Vertigo's relaunch of DC's Bronze Age horror series House of Mystery is better than ever, but the premiere issue was loaded with enough mystery and horror (yes, horror) - as well as delicious hints of greater mysteries and horrors to come - that the final page left me both satiated and hungry for more.

Most of the issue is spent setting up the ground rules of this all new House and introducing its rather large cast of storytelling characters.  The one story offered, Hungry Sally's The Hollows, is short on narrative logic, but long on nightmarish and gruesome imagery, and it ends with a nifty little punchline that shows that the writers and artists of this new series know exactly what they are doing and that they clearly love doing it.

And I think that I am going to love reading it.

The Zombie: Simon Garth

Wrecks

"Mabel, I think something very, very bad might be happening."

Simon Garth's status as sole survivor of the zombie plague that took the lives of the bank robbers that had taken him hostage is short lived.  He succumbs to his wounds and dies, but quickly returns to "life" as a rather different kind of zombie.  He prefers to save people's lives rather than eat their bodies.  That's a very good thing, for the helicopter carrying Garth crashes and the zombie plague begins to spread with greater vigor than before...

When I finished the final issue of the first Simon Garth story I had high hopes for the hinted at sequel.  While Wrecks certainly delivered in the action and horror departments, and even tossed in a few good jokes (there was an apparent Ghost Rider gag in issue three that got me laughing fit to burst), the laws of diminishing returns were already being enforced. 

One of the greatest joys of the first limited series was the characters.  Simon, Gyp, and all the rest were so alive that reading the book was like watching a movie.  This time around the cast of characters are sketchy at best, paper thin cliches at the very worst.  At least writer Kyle Hotz kept the pace quick and the action heavy, so it was easy to look past the weak characterizations and just enjoy the mayhem perpetrated by the humans, the kooky inbreds, the zombies and the kooky inbred zombies.  There wasn't a dull moment in the book that I could find.

You know, I just cannot shake the feeling that I have seen the cover illustration for issue two somewhere else, come to think of it...each cover in this limited series seems to be homaging some iconic B-grade horror movie poster art of glorious days past.  It's a cute wink and nudge to the B-grade horror movie fans in general and was greatly appreciated by this one in particular.  A heartfelt well done to all involved.

Now back to what is behind - or between - those covers.  Being yet another variation on the zombie outbreak story, it comes as no surprise that events spiral from the simply nightmarish all the way to the nightmarishly out of control in a matter of panels.  But with genre stories it has never been about what happens, it's all about the way it happens.  Writing genre stories is a lot like playing jazz.  It's more about how the melody is interpreted by the artist than the melody itself.  (I hope that is an analogy that makes some kind of sense.)  To his credit Kyle Hotz tosses in a some interesting developments in the final chapter of his gruesome little tale.  Developments that hint at far more and much worse events awaiting those unlucky enough to have survived all the way to this story's inconclusive ending.  As with almost all zombie outbreak stories, the shit is only starting to really hit the fan when the story draws to its close.

If Simon Garth, or the zombie plague, or both, should return in a third blood soaked tale - and I strongly suspect that they will - then I will happily return as well.  I can't make a better recommendation for this collection of limited series stories than that, now can I?

Se7en #2: Greed

"From the least to the greatest, all are greedy, for gain; prophets and priests alike, all practice deceit - Jeremiah 6:13"

Eli Gould is a successful criminal defense attorney.  One that makes millions of dollars each year defending the indefensible and making sure that the evil deeds of the less than innocent go unpunished.  John Doe knows that this man will make the perfect example victim for the deadly sin of greed...

It's been quite awhile since I cracked open a Se7en spin-off comic book (the limited run series concluded last year) and I have to say that it really wasn't worth the wait.  Having been not all that impressed with the direction Gluttony had taken, I found that I had the very same problems with Greed.  The background story drafted by writers Ralph Tedesco and Joe Brusha just did not mesh all that well with the events in the film Se7en that this story is supposed to be setting up.  The problem with Gluttony is that the shut-in character of the film, who was so fat that he could not manage to get out of his apartment, was not the eating disorder suffering character presented in the comic book story.  Greed has a similar problem.  The character of Eli Gould is a one-dimensional dickweed that is so blackly evil that is impossible to care about him in the slightest, thus making his gruesome fate something to be cheered and robs the event of any and all visceral punch.  Perhaps if he had been made a bit more human and given a shot at possible redemption (not unlike Brad Pitt's doomed character in the source film) then the inevitable finale would have achieved a level of tragedy.  As it plays now it can't even reach the level of pathos.  If Brusha and Tedesco had been aiming for an E.C. Comics style of gruesome justice meted out upon the truly deserving, they forget to add the key ingredient of humor to help sweeten the bitter nihilism and make their story a bit more palatable.   

2001 Maniacs: The Curse of the Confederacy

"I believe you soldiers know how the plan goes from here..."

It is the month of April in the year 1864 and the war between the states is about to come crashing down on Pleasant Valley, Georgia.

I came into this comic cold, knowing almost nothing about writer Tim Sullivan's film 2001 Maniacs, other than it was a loving and over-the-top remake of Herschell Gordon Lewis's landmark gore/horror comedy Two Thousand Maniacs, and I left it feeling pretty much the same way.  It seems that at some point in the year 2007 I lost the last bit of interest I had in this kind of entertainment.

Since I have yet to see 2001 Maniacs (and I will probably be seeing Sullivan's more personal thriller Driftwood before I do) I can only make the dangerous assumption (for we all know what happens whenever one dares to assume) that this comic book prequel is more of the same: ample nudity, some crude sexual humor, and countless buckets of gore.  Tim Sullivan's dialog and expository narration prove to be unnecessary, because his background story is so boiler plate that the reader can easily follow it by simply looking at Raulo Caceres lovely artwork.  And very lovely it is, especially when detailing the nude female form.  A comedic bait and horror switch routine that revolves around a young lady's chastity belt is probably my favorite spread in the book, if you get what I mean...and I think you do.

Sullivan, in an enthusiastic introduction essay, promises that more Maniacs action is forthcoming, both in the form of movies (a sequel titled 2001 Maniacs: Beverly Hellbillies was formally announced at the Fangoria Weekend of Horrors held in San Jose in January of 2007) and comics (this proposed comic book series was also formally announced at the same event).  While this kind of thing may not be my cup of tea any more, I can't say that those who do enjoy this kind of entertainment won't enjoy it.  Sullivan and company know exactly what kind of goods to deliver and they do so with a great deal of glee and gusto.

Gravel #0 - "Between the Wars"

"Considering why I'm here, I'll say the night will get fuck ugly in less than five minutes."

Combat Magician Sergeant Major William "Bill" Gravel is back after spending a year slotting Taliban in Afghanistan, but everybody thinks that he's dead.  He's also lost his place in the Minor Seven to a complete and utter smeghead named Simon Shiranian.  Much ass is going to be kicked and many heads are going to roll as Gravel sets out to make things right again.

Ooh, I'm going to like this series.  In fact, I was hoping for one from the moment I first met Bill Gravel in Strange Kiss, way back in...shit, I forget.  But I stuck around for Stranger Kisses, which was good, but not nearly as good as the first time around, before falling off into whatever it was I fell into.  (Let me just say it was very, very hot there and reeked of brimstone and sulfur.)  But it's good to be back, to be alive, and to have Bill Gravel here to welcome me.  Between this debut, Moonstone's excellent run on Kolchak the Night Stalker, and IDW's wonderful Wormwood Gentleman Corpse, I have to say that it is a great time to be a geek getting back into the swing of things.  I also have to say that it is a good thing that the three are each published by a different house, because I don't think that the world be able to contain the pure undiluted explosion of awesome that would occur if they were ever to met, much less team-up.  Not that I would be wanting to give anyone some ideas.  Oh, no.  Not me.  Never.

Being a #0 issue Between the Wars is short and to the point.  A simple little teaser of a story that serves as an abbreviated introduction that explains who Bill Gravel is, why you don't ever want to fuck with him, and set-ups the challenge for his next round of supernatural ass kicking.  I'm locked and loaded and ready for the ride.  So bring it on.

Shaun of the Dead #s 1 - 4 (of 4)

"Look, I've got to do something.  If I don't, I'm going to end up in that pub every night for the rest of my life, like all those other sad old fuckers, drinking myself to death, wondering what the hell happened."

Shaun is a twenty-nine year old slacker who has been drifting through life with his best friend Ed by his side.  On Shaun's other side is Liz, his increasingly frustrated girlfriend.  When Shaun and Liz's four year anniversary passes by with no change in their relationship, Liz calls it quits.  Shaun is determined to win Liz back, but a sudden mass uprising of the dead places some rather unique obstacles in Shaun's path...

The comic book adaptation of Shaun of the Dead has been sitting in my To-Be-Read comic book stack for quite some time.  Judging by the June '05 date on the cover of issue one, I think it is safe to assume that it has taken me two years to getting around to finally cracking the damn thing open.  Could it possibly be worth the wait?

Well, yes and no.  On the yes side of the equation, the essentials of Shaun's story translates to the comic book format rather smoothly.  Chris Ryall's script adaptation does gloss/skip over some of witty banter and smart characterization touches in Simon (Shaun) Pegg and Edgar Wright's script, but enough of it is retained to keep the character of the film recognizably intact in this alternate version.  Which brings me to the no side of my reaction to the comic.  While reading issue one I kept thinking of the old saying, "drama is easy, comedy is hard," and that is precisely where I found this version of Shaun of the Dead to be wanting.  The comedy just didn't translate to the book all that well.  More than likely it had to do with the physical nature of it.  Being a motion picture, the comedy in Shaun of the Dead is meant to performed, not read.  And with such an essential part of the film's humor incapable of a smooth translation to a frozen moment narrative style, an integral part of the source material's charm is lost.

"You've got red on you."

There are two good examples of the uneven nature as to which humor and character moments successfully crossover to the comic book adaptation and what is lost in translation.  First is the scene where Pete goes postal on Shaun and Ed's post break-up drunken partying.  In the comic this integral scene is abbreviated down to the barest of essentials, becoming a "Cliff Notes" version of, in the context of the movie itself, a dramatically potent moment.  Pete's snarled "Maybe you need someone around that's more of a loser than you are" to Shaun, and the entire build-up to that cutting comment, is gone and sorely missed.  It's one of the best scenes in the movie.  (Clearly I have come to a point where character interaction means far more to me than all the gore and splatstick antics that even a moderately talented director, cast, and crew can toss onto the screen.)  Fairing better is the round of various escape plans Shaun and Ed toss back and forth.  (Those who have seen the movie know the sequence of which I speak.)  Since the scene was a quick montage of simple visual jokes, it's translation to the four-color panel format is much smoother and all of the dry humor remains.

"Take care of your Mum...there's a good boy..."

One thing I do greatly appreciate is the inclusion of Philip's final words to Shaun.  When Christopher and I saw the film for the first time, my wife had been dead for less than a year.  Christopher was all of nine (perhaps ten) years old and, has I heard Philip say to Shaun, "You were twelve when I met you, already grown so much.  I just wanted you to be strong, and not give up because you lost your dad...," I could hear some woman saying the same thing to my son.  By the time I finally "met" someone (a prospect that, even now, four years later, I find somewhere ludicrous and dreadful) my son would be twelve or older and, well...those words touched my heart in a way that very few movies ever have.  (Oddly enough, Rocky Balboa did the very same thing when Rocky told Paulie that there was this "Beast inside me" that was driving him to crawl back into the ring.  I had a beast of my very own that I had to confront. I did and, at long last, I'm happy and the painful turmoil in my heart is finally gone.)  Although I know that the sequence will not have the same emotional impact for everyone, I have to offer a personal thank you to comic scriptwriter Chris Ryall for keeping it in.

The remainder of issue three finds the comic adaptation finding its feet and hitting its stride.  No doubt this is due in large part to the source film's script, which, having established and developed its characters, began to focus more on the action and peril sequences that drive the third acts of just about every single horror movie ever made.  Who will survive, and what will be left of them?

"I'm sorry, Mum."

If you've seen Shaun of the Dead, and if you frequent this blog regularly, then chances are very good that you have, then you already know the answer to the "Who will survive, yadda-yadda-yadda" question.  If you haven't and don't, I'm not going to spoil it for you here.  But I can say that the fourth and final issue of Shaun of the Dead condenses the siege at the Winchester down to its dramatic/comedic highlights and thus brings the comic book to a suitably exciting conclusion.  One particular thing that will be of interest to fans of the film is the inclusion of a deleted scene: the sequence showing how Shaun, mistakenly thinking that he has managed to escape the zombie horde, instead leads them right back to the Winchester. 

The only negative criticism that I have to make about the final issue, and I am stretching things more than a bit by doing so, is that the reunion with Yvonne has been excised from this version.  But there are only so many pages and panels with which to translate an hour and forty minute long film, so some things just have to go.

So, can I recommend it?  Yes, but only to the die-hard collector/fan of horror movies tie-ins in general and to devoted fans of Shaun of the Dead in particular.  Y'all know who you are.

Beneath the Valley of the Rage #1 (of 4)

"This mutagen makes the Ebola virus seem like nothing more than a common cold by comparison."

The escaped lunatic Dr. Vasilienko has finally been captured and is now detained in a Guatemalan Insane Asylum.  Agent Sadko, having just lost her husband to Vasilienko's lethal Rage Virus, interrogates the mad doctor in the hopes that his deadly secrets can be revealed...

Two things about the cover art for Beneath the Valley of the Rage #1 amused the hell out of me.  First was how the "Misfit" dude in the upper right hand corner had me wondering what the hell a Ferengi was doing showing up in a prequel comic of a modestly budgeted horror movie.  The second was the strap on the mad doctor's groin.  Sad as it is for me to say, but the comic book this is, uh, beneath that cover art failed to achieve anything other than a bland and workmanlike competence.  John Bisson's script (working from a story Bisson drafted with the source movie's director, Robert Kurtzman) introduces stock characters into stock situations, with the resulting concoction playing out as shopworn and tired.  I don't know what horrible secrets await in the second issue, but the only direction the narrative can go from here is up.

Plague of the Living Dead - Special #1

"They're dead, man!  They're all dead!"

One early August night in 1971, the inhabitants of the small town of Stone Mountain, Virginia find themselves under attack from the reanimated, flesh eating dead.

The zombie epidemic in horror comics has gotten so bad that I'm beginning to wonder if somebody put Lucio Fulci (or Umberto Lenzi, or Bruno Mattei) in charge of product development.  Not that it's all that much of a bad thing.  I'm still reading and, more importantly, enjoying the books.  So that means I will be buying more of them in the (near) future.  Avatar, IDW and Marvel (who have all jumped onto the zombie band wagon with an enthusiasm rivaled only by the post Romero version Dawn of the Dead Italian film industry) will no doubt be happy to hear that I will continue to willing drop my hard earned cash into their coffers.  As long as the reading remains fun, I will remain a zombie comic book reader.

And Plague of the Living Dead is a lot of fun, it's just not much of anything else.  Mike Wolfer, adapting a story by Night of the Living Dead co-author John Russo, does a commendable job* of blending together a retro 1950s style monster attack story with plenty of 1970s era political paranoia (although the current political landscape makes the paranoia aspect feel fresh, rather than dated), but very few of the characters he introduces get a chance to fully flesh out the story before getting the flesh ripped from their bodies.  In fact, there doesn't seem to be all that much dramatic meat left on one of the book's storylines by the time the cliffhanger rolls around.  But the subplot involving the military seems very, very promising.  I'm looking forward to seeing how that story develops as the zombie plague worsens.

*I also have to make a special note of what seems to be a multi-level in-joke in the book.  In several panels the character of Corporal Todd Clark resembles Dawn of the Dead star Ken Foree just a little bit too much to feel like a coincidence.  And the actor Tony Todd starred in the Tom Savini directed remake of Night of the Living Dead. And Corporal Todd's snarled "Fuck. You. Sir." is a direct quote of a line in Day of the Dead.  If all that was intentional, I have to stand in awe of the level of love for the source material that Plague is spinning off of.  If it wasn't, then it is clear that I really do need to get out of the house more often.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre #s 2 & 3: Americarnivore Parts 2 & 3 (of 6)

"Because some of these kills are fresh!"

Federal Agents Henkle and Baines, ignoring the orders of Federal Agent Hooper, explore the dump pit tunnels beneath Fuller, Texas and find that they lead straight to the Hewitt home.  WTX News reporter Kim Burns and her crew arrive at the Blair Meat Plant to do a location story about the horrible events of the previous year.  But the past is far from being mere history.

Hooper, Henkle, and Burns...can there please be a moratorium placed on the practice of naming characters after prominent genre figures, it has long since become a tiresome cliche.  But other than that not so cute nudge n' wink at the original film's cast and crew I found nothing tiresome or cliched about the second chapter of the Americarnivore story arc.  It had me on the edge of my seat from the opening panel all the way to the Here-We-Go-Again cliffhanger.  Writers Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning have really done an excellent job, creating a story that is drenched in How-Bad-Is-This-Going-To-Get suspense.  But the book is elevated to the level of outstanding by Wesley Craig's art and Randy Mayor's colors.  Each and every panel oozes with Southern Gothic atmosphere and Grand Guignol grue.  This book is shaping up to be the best Texas Chainsaw Massacre sequel never made (into a movie, that is).

"This is like the center of the sicko-verse."

Kim and Marcus search for the missing Karla, but they find some serious trouble instead.  The vengeance obsessed Baines coaxes the rest of the Federal Agents into helping him take the fight to those carrying on the Hewitt family tradition, but Agent Hooper still has a lot to learn about Old School Justice seeking.

Oh.  My.  God.  This issue is just vicious, it had me gasping and groaning in shock and dismay as the noose closed (literally) around poor, doomed Karla and, several pages later, Marcus.  I know I just praised the outstanding work of Wesley Craig and Randy Mayor a few paragraphs ago, but the first seven pages of this issue (which consist of Karla's unfortunate fate) is simply brilliant.  Rather than keep the reader in a safely objective point of view, the sequence unfolds almost entirely from the viewpoint of the bound and gagged Karla.  This gives the scene an immediacy and power that all the gore in the world could not deliver.  The creative team behind this book not only clearly know and love horror, but they also understand what makes it work and work well.

But the horror doesn't stop there, and why should it?  There are still plenty of victims out there to be hacked up for barbecue and Kim and Marcus are quick to step up to the plate.  It is here that the book's solid writing shines, with the tour guide set-up in issue two playing out in a truly unsettling manner.  This was the point that had me gasping and groaning with shock and dread, and I loved every single panel of it.  It is stuff like this that makes me proud to be a horror fan.

And the issue three cliffhanger is absolute perfection.

Friday the 13th #s 5 & 6 (of 6)

"This is not happening...this is not happening...this is not happening...this is not happening..."

At this stage the story synopsis becomes a single, straight forward sentence: Jason thins the survivor herd.  That's about it, but that "it" is what brings us Friday the 13th fan boys (and girls) coming back for more.  There is just something that is almost mythically pure in watching the gory spectacle that is Mrs. Voorhees beloved son slaughtering any and all foolish enough to step into his territory.  You would think that people would learn.  But if they did, then there wouldn't be anymore Friday the 13th stories and, well, I guess I shouldn't complain about it too much.

Now that the flashback events (you remember that these events are all a flashback, right?) are drawing close to the where the book began the "here and now" segment of lone survivor Sally's story is used as a framing device to cut the over-the-top gory murder set pieces (unrated all the way) into reasonably tidy little chapters of monstrous mayhem.  Poor Sally has slipped into catatonia (maybe) and now has to suffer the suspicious theories of the Crystal Lake police officer who is "questioning" her.  That he doesn't believe in zombified serial murderers isn't helping him in buying her outlandish tale.  (I'm guessing that this doofus has to be new to the Crystal Lake area, or maybe he's just a really piss poor student of local history.) 

Who met which fate and how lone survivor Sally came to be in her condition is all revealed in an action packed spectacle of gruesome mayhem that will delight just about any fan of Friday the 13th.

"The perfect killing machine, cursed to die and rise from the grave again and again."

The source of Jason's unstoppable, unkillable power is finally revealed and Sally learns how difficult it is to escape Jason Voorhees.

Jason reinvented as the embodiment of an ancient Native American curse (at least it's a better explanation than the far goofier theory offered up in Jason Goes to Hell - The Final Friday) and a plot twist that looks like it could have been torn out of Avatar's Friday the 13th: Fearbook one-shot were the eyebrow lifting offerings of issue six in what may or may not be the final issue of Wildstorm's Friday the 13th series.  While I hope it isn't the final issue, I also hope that the next story arc does something just a little bit more original than giving the reader yet another Native American curse topped off with yet another "You thought you were safe...you thought wrong" gotcha ending.

But there was plenty of stuff that had me grinning and chuckling with geekbastic fan boy delight:  Adam Archer and Peter Guzman's lovely renderings of Jason's surprise attack on Alice (from the very first Friday the 13th) and Mrs. Voorhees severed head in the refrigerator (from Friday the 13th Part 2), Officer Asshole's much deserved comeuppance at the hand (or is that machete) of the zombified serial killer he was convinced did not exist, and the "They really do never learn" denouement that leaves the door wide open for further bloodshed and mayhem.

Please, please, please let there be more forthcoming.

A Nightmare on Elm Street #s 2 & 3: Freddy's War Parts 2 & 3 (of 3)

"I can do this."

Jade, failing at avoiding sleep, tries to find the identity of the little girl that keeps appearing in, then disappearing from, her dreams.  Things don't go all that well...

The middle chapter of Freddy's War is middle of the road stuff, nothing more.  As was the case with every film in the long running series, the nightmare sequences are the issue's high points.  The rest is just a redressing of the routine "hunting for clues and/or weapons to use against Krueger in the next dream" filler that has padded out the middle section of every single A Nightmare on Elm Street movie since the very first one.  Writer Chuck Dixon does manage to twist the formula into taking some interesting paths, but it really isn't enough to elevate the story above the level of average.  That doesn't happen until the third and final chapter.

"I rule the night here, Dad!  I RULE THE NIGHT!"

Jade and her father attempt to battle Freddy in the Dream World...

And what a battle it is!  Freddy's War comes to a satisfying and action packed close with a payoff that was worth every panel of its overly familiar build-up.  Although your results might vary, the story's conclusion caught me off guard.  I didn't see it coming.  Then again, I wasn't looking all that hard for a "shocking twist" to begin with.  I was just enjoying all the carnage as Jade and her dad emptied every weapon they could dream of at Krueger.  That part of the book had me grinning ear to ear.  I was also happy with how well the ending managed to blend the vicious with the gentle.  Another thing that I liked was how the finale page left the door open so that the few surviving characters could return, if needed, to liven up a future story arc.  But whether or not I will even bother to read that next arc is a decision I have yet to make.

Wormwood Gentleman Corpse #7: It Only Hurts When I Pee Part 3 (of 3)

"Just once, I'd like things to be a little less complicated.  Just once.  I mean, what minor Luck God did I piss off that badly?"

Wormwood, Pendulum, and Phoebe are finally introduced to the Leprechaun Queen.  Unfortunately the Squidmen crash the party before Wormwood has the opportunity to request the cure for what ails him...

The concluding chapter of the It Only Hurts When I Pee story arc had me laughing out loud from start to finish.  But I wasn't laughing so hard that I failed to notice the icy shiver of dread that slithered up my spine as the Squidmen became what appears to be the next story's primary foe.  Nor was I laughing so hard that the sad fate that befell all of Leprechaunia didn't effect me, it did.  Wormwood Gentleman Corpse remains a topnotch and smashing good horror comic, one that has quickly become my favorite genre read.

If creator, writer and artist Ben Templesmith can keep the quality of the upcoming stories as high as the previous two (and that is no easy task) then I'm afraid I'm going to have to start begging for a Wormwood animated movie, or at least an action figure that I can put on my desk.

Right now all I can hope for is that the wait for the next story will not be a particularly lengthy one.

Legion of Monsters: Man-Thing

"All things must know their place."

Terrence Deflyte is the last of the Citrusville Deflytes and, because he is the sole heir, he owns almost every square inch of the town he hates.  Deflyte's hatred has become focused on the "untamed wasteland" that his family's town was built upon and it fuels an obsessive need to tame and control his environment.  He keeps everything in the place that he has assigned to it and severely punishes any and all that step outside of his strictly enforced boundaries.  Esperanza, a homeless wanderer, falls into the trap of working for Deflyte and, shortly thereafter, she makes a horrifying discovery...

I have a vague memory of reading Man-Thing when I was a child.  Something not all that surprising, considering what a big fan of monster stories I was and am.  I don't know how long I read Man-Thing, I only remember one particular story with any clarity: A woman meets the man of her dreams and runs away with him, but he turns out to be the Man-Thing in disguise.  A former boyfriend comes to her aid and his heroism is repaid by getting his face badly burned.  (Remember, all who know fear burn at the touch of the Man-Thing.)  The only other thing that stuck with me was Man-Thing's distinctive look.  I imagine that Man-Thing is what the child of Swamp Thing and Cthulhu would look like.

That vague, albeit favorable, memory coupled with the creature's distinctive look made picking up this all new Man-Thing comic a done deal; I love a good monster story more than anything.  But, sad as it is for me to write, A Flower in Alien Soil isn't a good monster story.  It's a terrible one.  Deflyte (who is the true monster of the story, of course) is a mish mash of negative character traits that refuse to blend together.  His hatred of Citrusville is introduced, but never expanded upon, as is his psychotic need to control everything.  Neither character trait matches his behavior in the comic, nor does his actions have anything to do with the events that follow.  The kindhearted Esperanza is nothing more that a sketchy MacGuffin, while the title character has what amounts to a glorified cameo in its own book.  It's a confusing mess.

However, writer Charlie Huston does manage to deliver a suitably grotesque finale to his jumble of a story.  It doesn't salvage what has come before, but it does deliver the horror comic goods in a truly Grand Guignol fashion.

Also included in the book:

Simon Garth: Zombie: Morgue Amore

"Mister Stinky?"

A lonely zombie searches for love.

Now this is a fun little monster story.  One that is filled with humor and some interesting plot developments.  I especially liked the main character's run-in with a gang of punk rockers (although I do think that a Goth gang might have been a more welcoming social circle) and the last page is simply priceless.  This story alone makes the book worth buying.  If you're into funny zombie stories, that is.

Night of the Living Dead: Just A Girl

"So many ifs, for just a girl."

The year is 1968 and it is the start of daylight savings time.  Harry Cooper, along with is wife Helen and their adopted daughter Karen, is en route to an important job interview.  The Cooper family outing, however, is canceled by the sudden mass uprising of the dead.  Harry and Helen manage to evade the zombies, but Karen is bitten and soon becomes very ill.

Little Karen Cooper is probably Night of the Living Dead's most iconic character.  Her zombified visage adorns everything from books, to DVDs, to tee-shirts, to coffee mugs, and even decorative garden trowels.  When I learned that John Russo and Mike Wolfer would be writing a one shot back story for Karen's journey from being "just a girl" to one of the undead, I was interested, excited, and, to be honest, more than a bit uncertain of how the story would play out.  My interest and excitement turned out to be completely justified, while my uncertainty was, thankfully, ill-founded.  The story is a Charles Dickens influenced heart breaker.  So heartbreaking is the story of Karen's short and tragic life that its inevitable ending moved me to tears.  I'm not going to say that it will move every reader that way (and my own bereavement troubles/issues no doubt added to the overall effect), and some might even argue that Russo and Wolfer go more than a bit overboard.  Then again, in a world where the dead are returning to live and eating the living, the word "overboard" loses much of its meaning.

Karen's narrative arc also has a close resemblance in tone and style to that of the lead zombie's back story one in Avatar's Escape of the Living Dead: Fearbook one shot.  Somewhere along the line dying and becoming a zombie stopped being something horrific and became, if not a "better" way of life, at least a far simpler and, apparently, far less painful way of existing in this world.  My best guess would be its the influence of Bub, the zombie with a soul, from Romero's 1985 zombie apocalypse opus, Day of the Dead.  Your opinion might, and probably will, differ.

Escape of the Living Dead: Annual #1

"Well, it couldn't get any worse, right...?"

E.C., Moon and Scorpio may have survived their first run-in with the walking dead, but their adventures in terror are far from over.  The heavy rains of a fierce hurricane have caused the Jamestown Dam to rupture and the flood waters are filled with zombies...

Of the Escape of the Living Dead stories that I have read so far, I think this one-shot is going to stay at the top of my all time favorites short list.  It's just a really well done zombie story.  The fact that it also combines elements of my other favorite genre, the disaster story, didn't hurt.

Picking up shortly after the cliffhanger ending of Airborne, this new chapter sprinkles a few more interesting twists into the growing Escape zombie mythos.  Most of them revolve around the growing intelligence of Deadhead, the lead zombie.  Another plus is how the book's current group of heroes (E.C., Moon, and her lover Scorpio) are more than a bit smarter than the average doomed-to-be-zombie-chow types that usually clutter up these stories.  But there are plenty of those in the book as well, because all those zombie's have got to have somebody to eat.

The issue is also quite visually striking, filled with plenty of Gothic imagery and ample amounts of both gore and nudity (male and female, for a refreshing change - so no one can complain that these stories are for guys only).  My choice for the issue's most arresting moment is a dialog and sound effect free page showing Deadhead grabbing the attention of the zombies gathered inside a church.  Something is clearly going on with this evolving character* and I am eager to find out what will happen in the next Escape of the Living Dead story.

*I also have begun to wonder if Deadhead's refusal to eat any human victims, and his clear role as leader of the zombie pack, is some sort of homage to the characters of Big Daddy and Bub in George Romero's Land of the Dead and Day of the Dead, respectively.  Just something that makes me go, Hmmm.

Friday the 13th #s 3 & 4

"I don't care what anybody says, he can't be killed because...he's not human."

Nate and Jerry are missing, so Mike and Sally head off to search for them while the rest of the group stays at Camp Crystal Lake to begin the much needed repair work.

But Jason Voorhees is close by, and far from over.

If you have seen any one of the ten Friday the 13th movies, then you will know what to expect on the pages of this comic book, and boy does it ever deliver on that front.  It turns out that my PG-13 rated book concerns (expressed way back in my review of issue one) were very ill founded.  Jason Voorhees (or is he?) hasn't lost any of his edge in the jump from Avatar to Wildstorm, the book delivers the gruesome goods with glee.

But writers Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti are smart enough to not forget the characters they have been developing in the previous issues.  As the situation unfolds, secrets are revealed that threaten to turn most of the group against each other.  This not only makes for easier hunting for rotted old Mr. Voorhees, but it keeps the stuff between the murder set pieces dramatically interesting.  Over all, the book continues to be a solidly constructed and very energetic return to the "Classic (a.k.a. Paramount) Era" style of the Friday the 13th series, and I seriously doubt that any Friday fanboy (and I'm a pretty big one) will put the book down disappointed.

Wormwood Gentleman Corpse #s 5 & 6: It Only Hurts When I Pee Parts 1 & 2 (of 3)

"If I want to watch gibbering, castrated midgets fornicating all over each other in an event they have the gall to call a fight, I'll watch C-Span, thank you very much."

When a lustfully infatuated Lepper (Leprechaun) attempts to have some rough love with Mr. Pendulum, Wormwood gets a nasty bite on the arm.  Unfortunately, Leprechaun bites carry a fatal infection that only the Leprechaun Queen can cure.

Or so rumor has it...

Wormwood Gentleman Corpse's second story arc is a far simpler and straight forward one than the four part Birds, Bees, Blood and Beer that kick started what is shaping up to be my new favorite ongoing horror comic.  On its surface, It Only Hurts When I Pee is a comedy of errors laden (anything that can go wrong does) quest for the cure to what ails Wormwood.  But this not-so-pleasant-journey allows writer/illustrator Ben Templesmith the opportunity to dig a bit deeper into both Wormwood's character and back story, as well as the many different levels to be found in the sentient maggot's multidimensional world.  Pee introduces several new characters and creatures (both friend and foe, the best of the latter being the Squidmen, creatures that appear to be what the result of the Borg assimilating Cthulhu - or maybe it would be the other way around - would be like) and takes its primary characters (and the book's reader) into a different dimension, and a very different world.

This time around there is far more humor, but the story so far has, for me, at least, managed to avoid the dreaded camp humor trap.  While the characters and their reactions to their situation are funny (the scene where Wormwood - using a little girl's corpse - sweet talks the group out of an unforeseen run-in with the monstrous Squidmen is a favorite bit), the situation itself, while both over-the-top and out of this world, literally as well as figuratively, isn't treated as a joke.  If it where, then there would be no sense of urgency to the group's journey, no suspense.  It would be just one ludicrous joke after another.  But there are very real, and very deadly, dangers crawling around the various dimensions.  It's that little thread of acknowledged spookiness that makes this weird world of Wormwood's so much fun to visit.  (But I sure as hell wouldn't want to live there.)

Ghost Rider #7: Hell To Pay Part Two

"Johnny Blaze is a loser, an idiot.  All you need to do is apply enough pressure and he will do something stupid."

The battle between the Ghost Rider and Satan continues, but it seems that Johnny Blaze's spirit isn't beneath the flaming skull this time around.  It's someone else.

Meanwhile, in the past, the noose tightens around Johnny Blaze's neck.

Hell to Pay closes with more questions raised than answered, which befits the book's serialized format, but it left me scratching my head in confusion.  Although this reader will came away knowing the hows of Blaze's death, the whys of it are still very much a mystery.  Still, enough hints were made that I'm certain some intriguing revelations lay on the no doubt bumpy road ahead.  Horror wise, this two-parter blew its wad of chills in the first installment.  This time around it's just action (something that is always appreciated) and back story exposition (something that is less appreciated, but every bit as necessary to the success of a book - it is always helpful for the reader to know the hows and whys of what is going on).  Filled with more set-up than payoff, Hell to Pay is more of a promissory note than it is cash on hand.

Zombies!: Eclipse of the Undead #4

"Life, that tiny spark, still breaks through even in the most hostile environments."

Lonzo's attempt to sexually assault Suzy fizzles, but the noise he makes attracts the very unwanted attention of the zombie horde.  Brad, Paquita, Shigeru, and the others are forced to flee and find immediate shelter.

Although Eclipse of the Undead #4 doesn't skimp on the zombie action, the overall tone of this story's concluding chapter is one of maintaining hope and finding peace.  It's a refreshing change of pace from the nihilistic tone that most zombie stories have.  (More often than not, zombie stories tend to end with the zombies triumphant and the last few survivors, if any have managed to make it to the story's end in one piece, facing certain death.)   The best critical comparison I can make is to George Romero's excellent Day of the Dead (my all-time favorite zombie movie).  In fact, Shigeru's "life goes on" speech to the group nicely echoes John's "start anew" speech to Sarah in Day.  If more zombie stories would take this route, then the "death ALWAYS triumphs in the end" downbeat ending wouldn't be such a tired cliche.

Night of the Living Dead: The Beginning #s 2 & 3

"What the hell is wrong with...you...?"

The situation at Beekman's Diner, and at Christine's Grandmother's farmhouse, turns evermore grim as the number of zombies grows.

After getting off to what seemed to be a promising start, Night of the Living Dead: The Beginning succumbed to the curse of the prequel, dramatizing events that blatantly contradict and/or undermine the preexisting story, rather than fleshing it out and giving the reader new insight into the characters, both old and new.  Although it has been more than a few years since I have actually watched Night of the Living Dead from beginning to end, many of the things that Ben sees and experiences at Beekman's diner do not jibe with the story that he will tell Barbra later that night.  Another criticism that I have regarding the book also skirts spoiler territory, as it involves my concerns regarding the numerous characters introduced in the first issue that are already doomed by a preordained plot.  Let me just say that my concerns turned out to be well founded and leave it at that.

Pesky prequel plot issues set to the side, I have to say that Night of the Living Dead: The Beginning is a pretty decent zombie story on its own.  The revelations of the nature of the threat, what the zombies do to their victims, and how the contagion is spread, are all woven through the unfolding events in a manner that establishes the now legendary Night of the Living Dead rules without calling too much attention to them.  However, readers that know more than a thing or two about how the very same revelations are presented in the film that follows this comic will no doubt mutter, "But wait a minute," a time or two, just as I did.  Another thing that impressed was just how well the events at the beginning of the film are interpolated into this new story, allowing the Night of the Living Dead knowledgeable reader to piece together a fairly specific time line of where the events in the comic fit into the film.  The ending also does an excellent job of both homaging and foreshadowing the film's (in)famous ending, and I think that the comic's closing image is perfect.

While the comic is nowhere near as good as the movie it is setting up, it still has enough good stuff in it to satisfy the curious, not to mention forgiving, Night of the Living Dead fan.

Hack/Slash vs. Chucky

"Demon?  This is lame.  I wanna stab something."

Laura Lochs is still alive.  Eager to have revenge for the punishment dealt to her by Cassie Hack and Vlad in Hack/Slash: Girls Gone Dead, Laura reanimates the Good Guy doll that houses the spirit of Charles Lee Ray, the infamous Lakeshore Slasher, a.k.a. Chucky.  Having harnessed the doll man's dark powers, Laura is ready to attack, torture, and kill Cassie and Vlad.

But Laura has forgotten all about Chucky, who doesn't take kindly to being used...

Oh.  My.  God.  I am in love.  Truly, madly, deeply in love.  Cassie Hack is the single most awesomely beautiful psycho killing badass on the planet.

Okay, she might be the only awesomely beautiful psycho killing badass on the planet, but she's so damn good and hot at doing it, the world is in need of no other.

I had heard of Hack/Slash, but had never had a chance to read it (an oversight that I will quickly remedy by reading it from now on), because the comic book shop that I frequent didn't stock the book and, being easily distracted by bright and shiny things, I kept forgetting to special order it.  I'm not going to make that mistake again, I tell you.  I'm good and hooked.

Hack/Slash vs. Chucky seems to take place some time after the events in Seed of Chucky, at least I assume that to be the case, because Chucky's "remains" are still in Hollywood at the start of the story.  Writer Tim Seeley does a good job of capturing Chucky's personality.  As I read the killer doll's snarky dialog, I could hear actor Brad Dourif's voice (he being the voice of Chucky for the last 20 years) saying it in my mind.  Even Chucky's famous laugh reads right.  If you enjoyed the way Chucky was portrayed in either Bride or Seed of Chucky, then you will enjoy this outing, because it has the same darkly comic tone as those two films did.  Chucky was also very well drawn and colored, some of the panels could pass for stills from an actual  Child's Play sequel.

I'm sure the thin skinned religious types out there would gnash their teeth and rend their clothes at how conservative Christianity is, yet again, where the root of insanity is most deeply buried; but I doubt that they would even bother to pick up the book, much less read it.  But Laura Lochs' religious fanaticism gives the latter half of the book (which overcomes are rather convoluted set-up thanks in large part to its having so much fun setting the confrontation up) an interesting location: a fundamentalist Halloween style Hell House*, which also gives Chucky the opportunity to say what I think is the book's funniest line.  I won't spoil it here, but it'll be pretty easy to spot.  Fans of all things horror (or all things Hack/Slash and/or Chucky) should have as much fun reading this book as I did.  I recommend it unreservedly.

*You can learn more about the Hell House phenomenon by watching this documentary.

Lady Death Annual #1

"Some vacation..."

Lady Death, Satasha, and Wargoth decide to take a night off from their battle against Sagos and rest up at Castle Alcazar, the guests of one Count Flazino.  Unfortunately it is that very night that a hood wearing behemoth chooses to crawl out of his grave and attack the castle.

Coming from the perspective of someone that knows next to nothing about Lady Death and her adventures, I feel confident in recommending this stand alone story to be a good place to see if whether or not the gray toned lass is your kind of comic book heroine.  The story doesn't require any knowledge whatsoever of the current status quo of the book and all the important information that is needed for a Lady Death newbie to understand the who, what, and why of the primary characters and their current quest is unobtrusively slipped into the early scenes, as are some expository hints of the behemoth's character.  There are also some funny character based moments sprinkled throughout the tale.  My unfamiliarity with the characters did not stop me from understanding the jokes, or the action, and the conclusion had me interested in finding out what happens next.  I can't give any higher praise than that.

But a cheesecake laden Dark Fantasy book lives or dies by its artwork, rather than its writing.  And that statement is not meant to be a snide dismissal of Brian Pulido's script, far from it.  But if the book's title character is a hot chick with a sizable chip on her shoulder and an industrial strength can of whoop ass in her hand, then her looking the part is integral to the book's success.  Artists Richard Ortiz and Daniel Hdr do Lady Death justice, blending plenty of T&A titillation with generous amounts of Gothic imagery.  Newton Barbosa's inks and Chris Mendoza and Mark Sweeney's coloring are also top notch, with some deep, rich blacks and crimson reds filling the panels.  Lady Death (the character as well as the book) is simply gorgeous.  I think I'm going to enjoy reading this series.

Zombies!: Eclipse of the Undead #3

"You don't want to see what's coming for us!"

After a tense "discussion" about their rapidly deteriorating situation, Lonzo agrees to give the handful of survivors a ride.  But a ride to where?

One of the more interesting developments of Eclipse of the Undead's unfolding story is how the character that began this gruesome little tale (Brad, the Red Cross volunteer) has faded into the background, while other, far stronger characters (Paquita, to name just one) have taken over the story.  Discovering just who the real leaders and followers in the story are is only one of the things that makes Eclipse a far more satisfying read than the other Zombies! story (Feast) that I sampled awhile back.

Another satisfying thing is the attention to characterizations.  For me, the highlights in this issue are a conversation between the guilt plagued convict and the sensei and a glimpse of a hedonistic End of the World party being held on a nearby rooftop.  Both sequences play well off of each other and both help sharpen the focus of the story's underlying theme of how an individual's reaction to a situation is far more important than the situation itself.  I'm looking forward to finding out who, if any, will manage to survive both the continuing power struggle within the group, as well as the horde of hungry zombies that are literally nipping at their heels.

War of the Undead #1

"Oh, Count Dracula...yes, of course...why not?"

Hitler's "glorious" Reich has fallen and the Fuhrer is now dead, but the fight is far from over, it seems.  Herr Jabs has planned a counterattack against the Allies that is, quite literally, monstrous. 

Ah, Nazis.  So Evil, so vile, and so snazzily attired while being so.  Pop Culture adores the Myth of the Nazi (the smooth, cultured and oh-so efficient dispatcher of Evil) with as much passion as our compassionate nature despises them for the countless atrocities they have committed.  What makes the Nazi such a good, albeit more than a bit overused, villain is that, no matter what hideous or transgressive act is committed by a Nazi in a fictional story, it cannot hold a candle to the real life horrors they have permanently scarred the world with.  One is incapable of defaming a Nazi's character.  They truly are the perfect "reality based" B-movie villain.  Did I mention that they were also snazzy dressers? (I just know that, while I sit here typing this review, somewhere out there is a dominatrix dolled up as Ilsa - She Wolf of the SS, that is going to town on some bottom's fanny with a riding crop.)

What all that has to do with War of the Undead #1, I don't know, but I really needed to get it off my chest.  Now that I have, it's on to the comic:

Looking at the cover, I was expecting yet another zombie book, just with Nazi zombies.  Of course, when I thought of Nazi zombies, I thought of Shock Waves (the best Nazi zombie movie you could ever hope to see) and my heart fluttered at the possibilities my mind teased it with.  Well, it turns out my mind is a horrible tease, because War of the Monsters seems like a far more appropriate title for this book.  Then again, Dracula and the Mummy aren't exactly what I'd call alive, so that shows you how much my opinion really means on matters over which I have zero creative control.

Setting aside the somewhat refreshing absence of Nazi attired (and, far more likely than not, Romeroesque) zombies for a moment, War of the Undead is a goofy blast.  The story starts off with a fistful of in-jokes to a variety of genre characters and/or shows (making it clear that writer Bryan Johnson and artist Walt Flanagan have their tongues lodged in their cheeks about the whole thing) before it sprints into what looks to be some interesting old school/old world horror story territory.  Fans of House of Dracula and its multiple monster smackdown ilk should find something to enjoy here.

Ghost Rider #6: Hell to Pay Part One

"I gotta let it out."

Johnny's next battle with one of the 666 pieces of Lucifer wreaking havoc on the Earthly plain is a rather problematic one, for the Prince of Darkness has begun to grow stronger.  While Johnny puts up a good, if apparently losing, fight against Satan, he recalls the troubling events that befell him near Lynchburg, Tennessee, a very long time ago...

Last issue I lamented that the Coming Home one shot was a tad light in the action department, but I have no such laments to make this time.  The first part of Hell to Pay delivers all of the action-horror elements that got me good and hooked on this restart of the Ghost Rider book.  When I finished it, I was a very satisfied reader.

The issue won me over with its pre-title page sequence, which involves a river baptism gone horribly wrong.  It's a great little horror sequence made all the better by Richard Corben's art.  I especially liked the underwater POV panel, with the not who he seems to be minister looking happily into the eyes of the woman he is about to drown.  Daniel Way's dialog for Lucifer is also quite good, getting across his sadistic playfulness.  He really enjoys the pain he inflicts, especially on his most favored whipping boy, Johnny Blaze.

The flashback segment of the issue finds Johnny arrested and facing charges for the murder of a local.  Trapped in the small Southern town until the matter is resolved, Johnny is befriended by a scruffy fellow who may not be what he appears to be.  The cliffhanger leaves everything unresolved, of course, but the set-up certainly got me excited about finding out what happens next.  (A little voice in my head has started warning me that I'm going to wind up loving this book, which nicely scratches my horror geek itch, every bit as much as I might wind up hating the soon to be released Ghost Rider movie, which looks like it doesn't even have a clue of how to scratch a horror geek's itch.)  This is one book I'm glad to have started reading.

Vampirella: Revelations #0: Midnight at the Blood Bank

"Sooner or later that one topic is gonna come up."

A group of vampires, gathered together for drinks at a local "watering hole," share wild stories of the female crusader that is waging war against them.

Now that the book (one that has been sitting in my bookcase for well over a year) that this teaser issue had hyped has long since come and gone, and Fangoria Comics has now taken over the Vampirella series, I figured it was time to finally read it.

Being a teaser, there really isn't a whole lot to discuss here.  Some vampires talk about Vampirella before she shows up to show them all first hand that those rumors of her lethal moves are not at all exaggerated.  And that's about it, really.  Oh, there is a minor revelation hinting at how Vampirella's belief that she will earn her fallen mother Lilith's redemption by slaying all of her kin is a misguided one.  That hint is clearly setting up the origin story arc in the issues that follow it.  The rest of the teaser contains introductory interviews with the team of writers and artists (Mike Carey, Mike Lilly, Jay Faerber, and John Rozum) where they hint at the various directions they want to take the "Bad Girl" heroine.

I'll be honest here, all I knew about Vampirella when I picked this teaser up was that she's a hot alien babe that drinks blood, kicks ass (she even went up against Lady Death at one point) and that she has a long and storied history in pulp comics past.  Now that I have finally read this teaser, I have to say that I am interested to find out where Revelations went with its story, and to see what Fangoria Comics will do with the character when its version hits the racks later this year.  (I hope.)

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre #1

"This is the wrong end of Texas, Bond.  This is another fuckin' planet."

It has been almost a year since the crimes of the Hewitt family were discovered, but the deranged killer know as Leatherface remains at large.  FBI Agent Hooper (yes, Hooper, and there's also an Agent named Henkle, as well) brings a Cold Case team to Fuller, Texas to see if they can plow through the dead end the notorious mass murder case has hit.  Also en route to Fuller is the WTX news team, led by reporter Kim Burns.  Already in Fuller are Leatherface and what looks to be a new family of inbred lunatics hungry for some fresh meat.

The old cliche "the more things change, the more they stay the same" is given a prime example of its truth in Wildstorm's premiere issue for its recently launched The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  Nope, nothing new here.  But unlike the recently ended run at Avatar Press, Wildstorm's take on the Massacre Mythos at least spins its tale off of the hit film into a potentially interesting direction, the future.  Unfortunately Avatar writer Brian Pulido chose a far less fertile route, that of a prequel, something that robbed each and every tale of not only suspense, but also negated to possibility of any surprising plot developments occurring.  Writers Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning have not made that same mistake.  Their story moves forward, not backward, and they even makes subtle references to other films in the Massacre Mythos.  Not that any Texas Chainsaw Massacre story is all that different from another.  At least the book has a bit more story potential than its previous version did and, on a strictly visual level, Wesley Craig (art) and Randy Mayor (colors) recreate the gross and gritty feel of the movies so effectively, you might feel the need to take a shower after reading it.  Right now, however, I'm just going to take a wait and see attitude about the whole thing.

Road To Hell #2

"Nowhere can be any worse than this."

Frank Tanner has found his estranged and bad to the bone brother Derek, but the nightmarishly surreal situation they are in is only getting worse.

Road to Hell #2 doesn't explain a whole lot about the strange and brutal land that Frank and his friends have found themselves trapped in.  The only real revelation in this issue is the not at all surprising fact that people do not come to the hellish town of Liberty, they are tricked into arriving and become trapped there.  But by who?  And for what purpose?  Unencumbered by the expository weight of characterization or complex plot, Road to Hell #2 moves at a rapid clip and, just as I had suspected while reading issue one, the supporting cast is quickly thinned by the psychotic inhabitants that live along the wreck and corpse strewn road that never goes in any one direction for very long.  Hopefully issue three, where this strange road is supposed to come to an end, will offer up something along the lines of an explanation.  Then again, Joe R. Lansdale didn't offer up any explanations in his first two Drive-In books, and that didn't make them any less enjoyable.  The Drive-In novels, both of which have been adapted to the comic book format by Avatar Press, came to mind while I read Road to Hell #2, especially when Frank's group were attacked by the pack of feral children.  The closing image of that encounter, which Frank sees in his review mirror, is on my short list for favorite image of the book.

A Nightmare on Elm Street #1: Freddy's War Part One

"He kills children - teenagers - to get back at Springwood."

The Arnstrum family has relocated to lovely Springwood.  Jade and her brother Bradley don't even have a chance to finish unpacking before Freddy Krueger shows up to carve himself some fresh meat.

Wildstorm's first issue of its A Nightmare on Elm Street series certainly doesn't waste any time getting to the wet stuff, Freddy offs yet another Springwood teen on its very first page.  Writer Chuck Dixon doesn't bother to slow the breathless pace of his script down one bit after that, shoving his characters into the dream world and killing them off before the reader even gets a chance to know who they are, or how they relate to each other.

The book does do an excellent job of capturing the surreal feel of Wes Craven's original film and its numerous sequels, moving in and out of reality with the same almost seamless fluidity.  But, with a fuzzily sketched out heroine as it focus, the book becomes nothing more than a senseless jumble of over-the-top nightmare sequences with no thread to hold it all together.  I can't help but find it more than a bit ironic that the book based on the most simplistic and repetitive of splatter series, Friday the 13th, is the one that is weaving together an atmospheric and character driven story, while A Nightmare on Elm Street is doing the exact opposite.  Hopefully issue two will resolve that storytelling flaw.

Friday the 13th #2

"Don't die."

Sally is rescued and resuscitated, but she has little, if any, apparent memory of happened to her while under the water.  Not that it matters, for Sally's friend Sasha also experiences something otherworldly on the shores of Crystal Lake.

Jason Voorhees isn't the only restless spirit hidden beneath the still waters.

Do you remember those concerns I mentioned in my review of issue one, about how the new Friday the 13th comic book series seemed to be a toned down affair?  Well, it turns out they were completely unfounded.  The new Friday the 13th comic delivers all the necessary R-rated elements that a Friday fanboy expects from something that carries the series name.  (Or it delivered what I expect from one, at least.)

The book also has a decent amount of comedy that is actually funny.  Some of the gags had me throwing back my head and laughing out loud, however your laugh mileage might vary.  But it isn't all fun and games.  Writers Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti give their characters a fairly decent amount of depth, setting up some dramatic conflict and dropping some hints of conflicts to come.  While it is made clear that something other than Jason Voorhees lurks beneath the surface of Crystal Lake, Gray and Palmiotti do not forget that it's Jason Voorhees readers want.  So Mama Voorhees's beloved son makes a memorable appearance, the aftermath of which will probably play an important part in the next issue.

Lady Death: Sacrilege #0

"It's actually growing."

Hope (a.k.a. Lady Death herownself) and Satasha agree to help the city of Trembula deal with a rather unique problem.  For a hefty fee, of course.  It seems that the local church has begun to grow.  Not its congregation, the actual building.  If it isn't stopped, the church will eventually envelope all of the Blacklands.

This is the first Lady Death story that I've read, although I have brushed up against her once or twice when she went toe-to-toe against Purgatori (my first, and only, true Chaos Comics love) and, at a different time, in a different book, Vampirella, and, as is the case with all first times, it got off to a somewhat clumsy start.  The issue begins with a grammatical error, Lady Death says became instead of because, so glaring that it had me paying just as much attention to looking for other mistakes (there weren't any that I could find) as I was to the book's unfolding story.  As far as that is concerned, it's an interesting set-up, and I'm looking forward to seeing how Hope and Satasha do battle with this rather unique threat.

On an entirely different level, I'm just looking forward to seeing Hope and Satasha again.  Readers of the book will understand what it is that I am talking about.  If you have a craving for a certain kind of cheesecake, Lady Death will certainly satisfy.  Yum.

Zombie #4 (of 4): Dead Men Running

"Fuck me."

It's zero hour for Simon and Gyp, the only remaining survivors at the zombie overrun rest-stop.  Gyp's girl Angie has fled in the van for points unknown, and the "rescue team" that has arrived to evac the now missing Dr. Collins is anything but helpful.

Zombie's story arc comes to a more or less satisfying close (there is always a hint of melancholy to my satisfaction when an enjoyable story ends, because there is a part of me that isn't quite ready for it to do so) with plenty of tense stand-offs between Simon and Gyp, between Simon, Gyp, and the "rescue team," and between...well, it'd be best if you just read it.  I'm sure you'll enjoy it.

As is the case with all post Dawn of the Dead (original version, of course) zombie stories, the ultimate outcome, while grim, does leave the door wide open for more adventures.  If the same creative team, or whatever new blood Marvel decides to inject into the book, can create a new story as energetic and as fun to read as this outing was, then I'll be more than happy to dig into any and all future installments that might come shambling along.  Because I would love to find out what happens next.

I can't give any higher praise than that.

Ghost Rider #5: The Day Johnny Came Home

"I became the Ghost Rider."

Johnny "Ghost Rider" Blaze doesn't waste any time undertaking the task of sending the 666 pieces of Satan back to Hades.  But his most recent confrontation with the Devil forces Johnny to take the Memory Lane exit off of the Highway to Hell.

Now that he's been properly reintroduced, it's time for the new to Ghost Rider readers (such as myself) to get to know the man underneath the flaming skull.  What drove Johnny Blaze to sell his soul to the Devil?  How did he become the Ghost Rider?  The answers to those questions, and others, had been hinted at and/or touched upon during the events of Vicious Cycle, this relauch's premiere story.  Hell, even the trailer for the soon to be released movie explains the hows and whys of the Ghost Rider.  What was lacking, however, where the details...and everybody knows that is where the Devil lurks.

While those details are certainly intriguing, and even touching, they are inadequate substitutions for action, which The Day Johnny Came Home lacks.  The rollercoaster ride the cover illustration promises is nowhere to be found in the pages of this issue.  There is only a brief, albeit effective, action scene prelude and a somewhat impressive pyrotechnic conclusion to liven things up.  The rest of the issue is Johnny giving the Cliff Notes version of his tragedy littered journey to his eternal damnation and eventual transformation into the Ghost Rider.  While Johnny might be riding an emotional rollercoaster, recalling all the painful missteps and mistakes of his human past, there is a detached feeling to his tale.  Perhaps this was intentional on the part of writer Daniel Way, as the book's next story, a two-parter entitled Hell to Pay, will be focused on the death of Johnny Blaze; how it happened and why.  Now that the dramatic foundation of Johnny's tragic story has been laid out in greater detail, maybe the next arc will be able to contain more of that potent mixing of action and horror that made Vicious Cycle so much fun to read.

Mischief Night #1

"There's no such thing as the bogeyman, right?"

Time has not healed young Jenny Marsh's emotional wounds, she is still plagued by nightmares brought upon by the brutal murder of her best friend, Alexis.  While participating in a "Mischief Night" challenge (a Halloween party stunt, actually...but the title Halloween has been put to use elsewhere) Jenny and Alex discover that their school's outsider couple, Jack Rexler and his lolligoth "baby lady" Jill, have been burning some midnight oils.  The now cracked couple have cooked up a Mischief Night "prank" of their own.  They are going to poison the school's water supply.

The mortally wounded Alex destroys Jack and Jill's little chem lab, and that distraction gives Jenny a chance to escape.  She has been plagued by guilt about doing so ever since...

But time has not healed Jack and Jill's emotional troubles either, they still want to kill every last one of the "Cedar Avenue Crew."

Mischief Night is writer Brian Pulido's loving tribute to the slasher films of old.  You know, I really hate using that term for movies I saw as a teenager.  It seems like it was only yesterday that I was sitting in a neighborhood movie theater, watching them through my fingers.  But, truth be told, it was well over twenty years ago, so the phrase is accurate.  All those films are getting old. 

Although Pulido's affection for his subject is clear to see (there is one scene that brilliantly homages the original Halloween, as well as the first A Nightmare on Elm Street) his concept doesn't have nearly has much creative energy as his companion book, Bad Moon Rising, and Mischief Night suffers more than a little bit in comparison.  Rising's Black Jack Hatchet is a far more interesting, not to mention frightening, character than Night's whiny Goth couple, Jack and Jill.  And Jenny's connection to them isn't nearly as dramatically potent as Candy Huntington's familial link to Black Jack Hatchet.  Nevertheless, what Mischief lacks in story depth and/or complexity, it more than makes up for with the infectious fun Pulido and artist Juan Jose Ryp have in telling this overly simple tale.  Ryp's art is especially impressive, drenched in beautiful Gothic atmosphere every bit as much as it is in blood soaked gore.

If you enjoy the slasher films of old (you know, the ones Hollywood loves remaking today) then you are certain to find something to enjoy in Mischief Night.  (I did.)  But if you want something a little more original in your horror comic, then I have to recommend picking up Bad Moon Rising instead.

Bad Moon Rising #1

"He's back!  Black Jack Hatchet's back, I tell ya!"

The small town of Hope, Arizona, it's population a paltry 353, has become just another desert town turned tourist trap.  Hope's one claim to fame is that it is the resting place of the notorious "Black Jack Hatchet," an ax wielding psycho that had terrorized Hope, killing 88 people and destroying the entire town twice, in the early 1890s.

But past and present are about to have a bloody collision.  Candy Huntington, the descendant of the woman who had been the focus of Black Jack Hatchet's obsessive adoration, falls under the spell of a mysterious talisman and is drawn out to the desert, to the grave of Black Jack Hatchet...

Bad Moon Rising's premiere issue contains two horrifying stories: one set in contemporary Hope, the other in 1891, when Hope was still a thriving mining town.  Judging by this issue's cliffhanger ending, I'm going to hazard the guess that the two tales, both of which concern Black Jack Hatchet's obsessive, and murderous, search for his "girl" Wynonna, will continue to unfold in a parallel manner in the book's forthcoming installments.  Writer Brian Pulido keeps the method of how the good citizens of Hope consigned the seemingly supernaturally empowered and apparently indestructible Black Jack Hatchet to his grave a secret.  This gives both stories a compelling mystery to solve in between all the copious amounts of nudity and gore that artist Wellington Alves splashes across Bad Moon Rising's pages in lovely detail.

With its somewhat unique villain and setting (they're aren't a great many horror-western stories sitting on the shelves that I know of) and a concept with enough energy in it to propel its dual stories through several more issues, at least, Brian Pulido's Bad Moon Rising has gotten off to a very strong start.

Road To Hell #1

"Who ever heard of a tourist trap called Liberty?"

Frank Tanner thought that his selfish brother Derek was out of his life for good.  He thought wrong.  When Derek sends Frank a plea for help, with a helpful "find me here" map enclosed, the estranged brother, with some friends and family coming along for back-up, heads out to a desert no man's land town named Liberty.  The group soon discovers that their final destination isn't on any road map made in this world.

Road to Hell #1, which had been sitting on my "To Be Read" stack for far too long, does a nice job setting up a tale of brotherly love that looks to be taking the kind hearted Frank into the depths Hell itself.  Derek can stay there, for all I care, the guy's a world class creep and he seems to deserve whatever hellish fate awaits him in the Land of Fire and Brimstone.  Less successful are the introductions to Frank's four companions, who are so fuzzily sketched I couldn't help but wonder if they exist solely to be cannon fodder for Foreman and the Outfit, not to mention the grotesque monsters that live and lurk in the town of Liberty's shadows.  Come to think of it, the townspeople, save for one, don't look to be all that nice to any and all that find themselves visiting Liberty's mean streets.  Judging by the number of corpses and car wrecks that are littering the road into Liberty, a great many travelers have found themselves trapped there.  Getting there seems to be a relatively easy thing to do, it's the getting out that looks to be the difficult leg of the journey.

Zombie #3 (of 4): Left For Dead

"Okay...so what's the plan?"

Simon Garth's day in Hell just keeps getting worse.  The sweet and innocent appearing Angie is really the vicious Gyp's girlfriend, and the surprise arrival of the truck driver Bristol has flooded the Burger Palace with the undead.  At the moment the tide of carnivorous walking corpses is being kept at bay by a security gate, but it will only hold for so long.  What the group needs to do is escape...

Zombie maintains its plot twist a page pace in this satisfying set-up for what looks to be an apocalyptic conclusion.  While Mike Raicht's story isn't breaking any new narrative ground, at least the constantly changing situation keeps the now routine zombie plague chain of events from becoming boring.  Zombie has actually succeeded in getting me excited about finding out how it all ends, or if it ends at all.  It is a zombie plague story, and the situations in them have a way of spreading every bit as quickly as they spiral into chaos.

The only negative criticism that I have to make about the book is in regards to Kyle Hotz's stylized art.  Simon and Gyp both seem to share a certain resemblance to Bruce Campbell.  When they square off against one another, it's almost like watching Ash and Evil Ash argue and threaten each other and, during one fist fight between the two, I couldn't tell who was who.  Other than that, I have no complaints.  Zombie is a fun book.